As the calendar page turns over a new year, the flipping feels as fast as the commercials zipping by for Oprah’s WW, Nutrisystem, Lifetime Fitness, and E-Trade Investments….” A New Year, A New You” we’re promised. Blog posts boast the 5 ways to make resolutions stick and how to kick those recurring bad habits.
Motivating perhaps. Inspiring—maybe. Experience, for me, has borne out that focusing on a few areas and considering what might be possible these next 365 days can have a profound effect on what actually happens throughout, rather than just hoping the new year turns out better than the last. Asking, “What do I/we want this year?” “What are my goals?” “What needs to change?”
Enter, the 6 F’s:
- Faith
- Family
- Friends
- Finances
- Fitness
- Fun
The idea is to use these 6 categories as a framework for thinking intentionally about the different areas of your life and what you’d like to focus on, nurture, eliminate, and foster. If you prefer to take life as it comes, this idea may not be for you. But if you like being a bit more deliberate, here’s a brief snapshot of what this could look like in a few areas:
Faith—
- Visit 2 church small groups and commit to becoming part of one
- Consider observing a Lenten discipline; participate in Ash Wednesday service, Maundy Thursday foot washing service
- Volunteer in children’s ministry once a month
- Do monthly Virtue program with kids
Family—
- Begin responsibilities chart with rewards for everyone
- Discuss meal ideas and planning
Friends—
- Initiate family dinner night 3rd Friday of the month, inviting different family each month
- Host a “Big Hair Ball” to raise $ for _____
Finances—
- Consolidate retirement accounts
- Increase charitable giving by x%
- Participate in Generous Giving conference in April; get details
Fitness—
- Register boys for Spring soccer & winter basketball
- ? baseball for M?
- Scott do 1-2 ½ marathons
- Once-a-month family activity (bike ride, fun run, etc.) Scott to research
Fun
- Plan spring break trip–
- Plan ski vacation for Thanksgiving break
- Go to Dallas Museum of Art twice for family fun night
Over the years I’ve found that when I write down goals and dreams, they’re more likely to happen. John Maxwell and Mike Hyatt share the same experience. Reviewing notes from 2 years ago of musical events we wanted to experience, I discovered we have now seen all but 2 of the performers, and will enjoy one of those this month!
I learned about this 6F’s approach from long-time friends, who have been doing it for years. Turns out they got the idea from a former boss, who related that he and his wife spent New Year’s Eve doing this every year.
Here’s one way to approach the process:
- If possible, go away for at least 1 night. Maybe a Residence Inn, since there’s room to wander, a kitchen and fireplace. Talking about goals, dreams, and practical application over two days is better than just one evening. If you hit a difficult topic (like finances), you can get bogged down and need to sleep on some things. This month they’re venturing to San Francisco for their get-away.
- Incorporate the idea of reviewing the past year as well as planning for the next. Begin with the “fun” category and review everything you really, really enjoyed during the previous year.
- Focus on one category at a time, writing down all of the dreams you have for your life and that of your family. Don’t edit while you’re dreaming. Maybe not everything will work out to be a part of this year…but there’s always the next!
- Consider that companies and organizations regularly do retreats to stay on track and plan for the future. Why wouldn’t we want to do the same for the important people and relationships in our personal lives?
Of course the six F’s don’t cover everything, in particular, nitty-gritty details of life like household chores. Family Manager Kathy Peel has free helpful resources for determining “Who’s Responsible for What,” “Age Appropriate Chores,” etc. Each year you can decide whom in the family will be in charge of different responsibilities of things that have to be done (grocery shopping, cooking) and items that nurture the way we want to live (remembering birthdays, planning social events, etc.).
So, 2012…let’s see what may be in store this year that will shape us, inspire us, teach us, challenge us, make us laugh, help a friend, grow us!